What Not to Say at the Start of a Document Office Message
Starting a document office message the wrong way can confuse your reader or make you sound rude, even when you mean well. The first sentence sets the tone for the entire message, and many English learners accidentally use phrases that are too vague, too direct, or too informal for a professional setting. This guide shows you exactly which openings to avoid and what to say instead, so your messages are clear, polite, and effective from the very first word.
Quick Answer: Three Openings to Avoid
If you want your document office message to be taken seriously, avoid these three common starters:
- “I am writing to you about…” – This is wordy and delays your point.
- “As per our conversation…” – This sounds stiff and can feel like a lecture.
- “Please find attached…” – This puts the attachment before the purpose.
Instead, state your purpose directly and politely. For example: “Could you review the attached draft?” or “I have a quick question about the invoice.”
Why the First Line Matters
In a document office message, the first line is your handshake. It tells the reader whether you are being respectful, urgent, or careless. Many learners copy phrases from old emails or templates without thinking about how they sound. The result is a message that feels robotic or even pushy. A strong opening helps the reader understand your goal immediately and makes them more willing to help.
Openings to Avoid and What to Use Instead
1. “I am writing to you about…”
Why to avoid it: This phrase adds unnecessary words. The reader already knows you are writing. It delays the real message and can make you sound unsure.
Better alternatives:
- “I have a question about the report.”
- “Could you help me with the schedule?”
- “I need to update the contract details.”
When to use it: Only if you are writing a very formal letter to someone you have never contacted before. In most office messages, skip it.
2. “As per our conversation…”
Why to avoid it: This phrase can sound like you are reminding the reader of something they should already know. It can feel accusatory or overly formal.
Better alternatives:
- “Following up on our call earlier…”
- “Thanks for discussing the project with me.”
- “To confirm what we talked about…”
When to use it: Use it only when you need to document a specific agreement in a very formal context, such as a legal document.
3. “Please find attached…”
Why to avoid it: This phrase puts the attachment before the reason. The reader has to guess why the file is important.
Better alternatives:
- “I have attached the updated budget for your review.”
- “Here is the draft you asked for.”
- “The signed contract is attached.”
When to use it: In very short messages where the attachment is the only topic, such as “Please find attached the invoice.” Even then, a more direct version is better.
4. “I hope you are doing well.”
Why to avoid it: This is overused and feels like filler. It does not add value and can make your message seem generic.
Better alternatives:
- “I hope your week is going smoothly.” (more specific)
- Skip it entirely and start with your purpose.
When to use it: Only if you have a personal relationship with the reader and you genuinely want to check in. For most office messages, it is unnecessary.
5. “I just wanted to check…”
Why to avoid it: The word “just” weakens your message. It makes your request sound less important and can make you seem hesitant.
Better alternatives:
- “Could you confirm the deadline?”
- “Do you have an update on the report?”
- “I need to verify the meeting time.”
When to use it: In very casual messages to close colleagues, but even then, a direct question is clearer.
Comparison Table: Bad vs. Good Openings
| Bad Opening | Problem | Good Alternative |
|---|---|---|
| I am writing to you about the report. | Wordy and vague | I have a question about the report. |
| As per our conversation, I am sending the file. | Stiff and accusatory | Following up on our call, here is the file. |
| Please find attached the document. | Attachment before purpose | The signed document is attached. |
| I hope you are doing well. | Overused filler | I hope your week is going well. |
| I just wanted to check the status. | Weak and hesitant | Could you update me on the status? |
Natural Examples
Here are real-world examples of good openings for different situations.
Example 1: Asking for a review
Bad: “I am writing to you about the proposal. Please find attached.”
Good: “Could you review the attached proposal? I need your feedback by Friday.”
Example 2: Following up on a meeting
Bad: “As per our meeting, I am sending the notes.”
Good: “Thanks for the meeting earlier. Here are the notes I took.”
Example 3: Requesting information
Bad: “I just wanted to check if you have the data.”
Good: “Do you have the sales data for last quarter?”
Example 4: Sending a document
Bad: “Please find attached the contract.”
Good: “The signed contract is attached. Let me know if anything needs to change.”
Common Mistakes
Even advanced learners make these mistakes. Watch out for them.
Mistake 1: Using “I am writing” too often
This phrase appears in many template emails, but it is rarely necessary. It makes your message longer without adding meaning. Remove it and start with your real point.
Mistake 2: Starting with “Sorry to bother you”
This apology can make you seem unsure. Instead, be polite but direct. Say “Could you help me with…” rather than apologizing first.
Mistake 3: Using “Regarding” without context
“Regarding the invoice” is fine, but it does not tell the reader what you want. Add a verb: “Regarding the invoice, could you confirm the total?”
Mistake 4: Mixing formal and informal tone
Do not start with “Hey” and then use “kindly.” Pick one tone and stick with it. For most office messages, a polite but neutral tone works best.
Better Alternatives for Common Situations
Here is a quick reference for different message types.
For a polite request
Use: “Could you please…” or “Would you be able to…”
Avoid: “I need you to…” or “You must…”
For a problem explanation
Use: “I noticed an issue with…” or “There seems to be a problem with…”
Avoid: “You made a mistake…” or “This is wrong…”
For a follow-up
Use: “Just checking in on…” or “I wanted to follow up about…”
Avoid: “Did you forget…” or “You haven’t replied…”
For sharing a document
Use: “Here is the file you asked for.” or “I have attached the update.”
Avoid: “Please find attached…” or “Attached herewith…”
Mini Practice Section
Test yourself. Rewrite each bad opening into a good one. Then check the answers below.
- Bad: “I am writing to you about the meeting schedule.”
Your rewrite: _________________________________ - Bad: “As per our discussion, I am sending the report.”
Your rewrite: _________________________________ - Bad: “Please find attached the invoice.”
Your rewrite: _________________________________ - Bad: “I just wanted to check if you got my email.”
Your rewrite: _________________________________
Answers
- “Could you confirm the meeting schedule?”
- “Following up on our discussion, here is the report.”
- “The invoice is attached. Please let me know if you have questions.”
- “Did you receive my earlier email about the deadline?”
FAQ
1. Is it ever okay to start with “I am writing to you”?
Yes, but only in very formal letters to someone you have never contacted. In most office messages, it is better to go straight to your point.
2. Should I always include a greeting like “Dear [Name]”?
Yes, a greeting is polite and professional. Use “Dear [Name]” for formal messages and “Hi [Name]” for casual ones. Never skip the greeting entirely.
3. What if I am writing to a group of people?
Use “Dear team” or “Hi everyone.” Avoid “To whom it may concern” because it is impersonal. If you know the group’s name, use it, like “Dear Marketing Team.”
4. Can I start with a question?
Yes, starting with a polite question is often very effective. For example, “Could you help me with the budget report?” This gets straight to the point and sounds natural.
Final Advice
Your opening line is your chance to make a good first impression. Avoid filler phrases, be direct, and match your tone to the situation. If you are unsure, read your first sentence aloud. Does it sound natural? Does it tell the reader what you need? If not, rewrite it. For more guidance on starting messages the right way, explore our Document Office Message Starters section. You can also check our FAQ for common questions about office communication.
